Mean Gene Okerlund: "Welcome to Stu Hart's wrestling.
Let's start the show with a darker tone.
Let's bring out Jake The Snake Roberts!"


Jake The Snake Roberts' theme hits


Jake The Snake Roberts: "Mean Gene, you see...
I've got a message for the world.
Arlenen Smith Junior and I...
We're not just any ordinary wrestlers.
We're Satan's children, and we're on a mission.
A misson to bring darkness and destruction."


Jake: "Johnny Knoxville, has got no idea what's coming for him.
Satans children will send him straight to hell where he belongs."


Jake: "And there's nothing anyone can do to stop us...
Because we're the spawn of Satan himself.
So, Johnny Knoxville, you better be ready...
Because your pathetic little career will end once and for all!"


Hawk: "Listen up, everybody!
I've got a message for all you cyber criminals out there.
You think you can hack into people's shit and get away with it?
WELLLLLL....
To those hackers...
You're in for a world of hurt."


Hawk: "I've got my eyes on you hackers!
And my cybersecurity game is on point.
Attempt to breach my defenses, and you'll regret it.
I'll track you down and take you down."


Hawk: "To those dirty fucking hackers...
Don't say I didn't warn you..
Cuz when you step in my digital domain....
You will get the Doomsday Device!
OHHHHHH WHAAAAT AAAAAA
RUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSHHH!"


Mean Gene: "Johnny Knoxville, you're set to face Jake Roberts and Arlenan Smith Junior..
I heard you have an announcement."


Johnny Knoxville: "Well, Mean Gene, I got to tell ya...
I got a partner..
And my partner is going to be a surprise.
And let's just say it's someone who's been on...
The dark side of the ring."


Mean Gene Okerlund: "That's intriguing!"
Knoxville: "All I can say Gene...
That my partner has a history with Jake and Arlenan.
And he has got a score to settle.
It's going to be a wild ride, trust me."


Mean Gene: "Well, we can't wait to see who it is!
Johnny Knoxville: "That's the idea, Mean Gene!
I want to keep everyone guessing!"


Mean Gene: " Next week....
It will be Too Cold at home....
British Bulldog Davy boy smith and Bret Hart.
Will take on Kamala and Oreo.
Let's hear from Kamala and Oreo."


British Bulldog: "Hey Bret, can you fooken  believe it?
Next week we're facing off against Kamala and... a fooken Oreo!"
Bret: "Oh man, that's rich!"
Bulldog: "Yah I fooken kno..
I'll bring da fooken tea."


Bret: "Yeah, and maybe a side of milk to go with it.
But seriously, what are they thinking?
Do they really think they can out wrestle us?"
Bulldog: "I don't fooken know."


Mean Gene: "Let's hear from both Kamala and Oreo!"


Kamala: "Ya kno Bret and Bulldog...
we've been called a lot of things..
Lyke crazy, wild, even a lil bit cookie-crazy.
But you kno what?
We embrace it.
 We da cookie-iest tag team in the biz.
And we here to prove it."
Oreo: "That's right! We're the cream of the crop!
The creme de la creme."



Kamala: "Now, we know what you're thinking.
How can a couple of cookies out wrestle Bret an da Bulldog?
But let me tell you, we're not just any cookies.
We're the cookies that cookie-lovers dream of.
We da Oreo-iginals."
Oreo: "And we're not just cookie-cutters, either.
We're the real deal.
We're the cookies that'll make you say 'oh snap!"



Kamala: "So, Bret and Bulldog....
Let's get ready to crumble!
And let's prove once and for all..
Dat even tha most unlikely of duos can be the best team in the biz!"
Oreo: "If your not down with that lick this!"